– Red Flags –


I have created this page to be a persistent reminder of the on-going reflection & reminder of the progress of my life. Titling it as “red flags” was a decision made considering the immediate catalysts of the page’s inception & I sincerely hope that one day the title can be updated to “Green Light”, i.e. possibly signifying quantifiable success as assessed by a neutral 3rd-party.

Neutral 3rd parties – a crude definition
Examples of such could refer to academic institutes or professional institutions that are NOT driven by my performance; could also include individuals that have no tier-1 affiliations with me (so family members, loved ones, partying friends, etc are all out); in other words, these individuals assessing me should be void of any emotional bias or what normal people refers to as “concern for my feelings”.


Format
My internal assessment will adhere to the following format as close as possible, with any deviations done for the purpose of prioritising clarity of content & retaining authenticity.

Key Performance IndicatorShort-term Goal [socially-acceptable levels included when available to serve as benchmarks*] – Long-term Objective

Current status

Elaboration that above status is based on
Specific examples supporting assessment || Alternate perspectives


************INITIATION (a.k.a. the real deal begins here)************

Academic

Outcome of university studiesA basic degreeDun think I’m worthy to aim any higher.

Current status: 2.9

Well, it is set in stone already…I probably ain’t gonna get any honours at all. Since I did invest “decent” effort into my studies, the only reasonable conclusion is the lack of intelligence on my part. & I blame no one else but me. I dun even blame those foreign students. My point is, “if you ain’t good enough to be part of the competition, you ain’t good enough.” & I’m simply, good-for-nothing. I need to apologise to my investors for repaying their capital with a major disappointment.

Physique

IPPT performancePass (NO RT)GOLD (Incentive)

Update [08/09/10] – Passed my IPPT on my 28/08/10; which means I’m safe from RT for another year. It’s a terrible feeling to watch the faces of those working adults who have to return for RT sessions. I shall strive to avoid adding to the status quo. But anyway, when I show my father the result slip, his response (& I quote):

“这个及格又怎样?”

This means NOTHING to him.

Duly-noted. Anyway, since the pressure of passing has been relieved from my shoulders, I returned to try my hand at another IPPT attempt (& I will keep returning as long as I’m free). Only this time round, I didn’t hold back for any of the 4 static stations since my priority is no longer preserving energy for the last 2.4km run station. A couple of things to take note:

  • Darn, what happened to my 238cm in no.4 boots? I can no longer do that…now my max is 221cm. In PT kit. This is a shocking disgrace (to me)
  • My shuttle run is terribly slow
  • The chin-up machine failed to register 2 out of my 9 chin-ups.

Could have scored this during the earlier attempt; but I was too focused on conserving all energy for my 2.4km run

Nonetheless, for this second attempt on 07/09/10, I managed a “bronze”. Which means a $100 in my pocket. Perhaps I shall show him the $100 bill instead of my result slip. Perhaps it’ll foster a much more positive response. I’m really pissed with his remark; yes, passing my IPPT has no tangible effect, but the need to return for RT sessions will not bode well with any of my prospective employers. But I’m too jaded to explain this to him.

Current status: 13″ 40s for 2.4km run (as verified  by 2 separate runs on same trail on 2 alternate days)

Managed to pass the IPPT assessment from my last RT ahead of their allocated schedule. Have adopted a more relaxed training regime, naturally. To play safe, assume current status as borderline fail; to spur enthusiasm. Original training regime is a 3-round/5-round jog every alternate day (with the accompaniment of podcasts). Drafted out new training route the other day, as depicted below. Philosophy is geared towards the practical & sole goal of ensuring a definite 2.4km-pass, with secondary aim of raising intensity level of each session. Intentionally included 2 uphill sections to inoculate “safety buffer” into actual tests.

UPDATE:

Not very optimal

Not very optimal

There is an error in this route. Have to re-do.

There is an error in this route. Have to re-do.

P.S. chin-ups seems to be getting increasingly tougher as well.
UPDATE: as of 150709, able to perform 5 good ones (undergraft). Good ones means slow rise & steady release. Wouldn’t have it any other way. Target is 12 good ones. Then proceed to train overgraft.

UPDATE: on 310709, decision to draft a new running regime to conform to HIIT style. Intention to follow 3:2 breathing ratio for jogs only; adjust to 2:1 upon oxygen debt.

Financial Standings

CashSimple, just have a steady incomeDebt_free

Current status: Will have minimal sum coming in by end of week. Will have to use it to sustain till August input.

Near-future liabilities: reservist equipment, new laptop/laptop battery, new pair of glasses, new pair of leather shoes

Dunno why my cash outflow like rapids like that…in lieu of current conditions, I have no choice but to curb all spending on gadgets indefinitely. This extends to items like toys, & all form of electronic gear that isn’t necessary to keep my work/study-gear operational. In other words, items like a new laptop and the more “imminent” laptop battery is immediately evaluated to be a “no-go”. This decision will be reviewed upon my possible graduation where the opportunity for a good deal on laptops from the school may present itself. Of course, by then, the verdict on getting a new extended battery for my ol’ Samsung notebook is essentially self-explanatory.

On the other hand, I do need to get a new pair of spectacles as the current one has lenses that are scratched beyond recognition & paint job is peeling…revealing the titanium underneath). The toe area of my leather shoes are fading fast. I placed both items as priority since they will assist me in subtle ways towards presenting myself when I go for interviews. I mean, when my school years end and cash is scarce..having a superb battery life on hand ain’t gonna be much help.

Of course, the irritating torn in my flesh is always my military field gear. Which, much unto my oversight & negligence, has been permanently misplaced. I supposed at the bare minimum I need to get my “4-pack” ready when my ICT begins in a year’s time. Unfortunately, this implies that I will have to set aside approximately $200 to rebuild the  kit. Heard from friend that I can request for “helmet & SBO” to be issued during ICT, but I’ll need verification on this from much more accountable sources. Also need to get hold of most updated “field pack list”.

Bottom-line for now? All expenditure to be directed on meals only. NO GEAR budget.

*Items in red denotes a deadline of 1 year

Family

Relationships

Communications (Listening, Speaking & Writing)

ListeningBeing able to capture/memorise all the words spokenGrasp the gist of the speaker’s intentions as well as accurately perceive the words that are not spoken

Current status: incapability to pay attention to every single words; often forgetting what were spoken by others a couple of days back; the need to return to original speaker to request for reiteration

I feel for those that get irritated when someone returns to them shortly after a conversation has passed & request for a 2nd serving of what they should have “consumed” from the 1st round. Unfortunately, I have also unintentionally committed such an offence. If I cannot remember it, carry a notepad and jot it down! Don’t tell yourself that you can capture the details! Information decay occurs the moment the speaker leaves one’s vicinity, after which you only have yourself to blame. Bottom-line: focus with undivided attention to the speaker, & carry a mechanism to record the critical details &/or action items.

SpeakingReduction & eventual removal of slur/mumblingSpeaking in concise, impactful, content-rich sentences

Current status: slurred & mumbling @ times

I discover that my speech has become more & more slurred since a couple of years back for no reason at all. At times, I even find myself mumbling. This is rather unnerving and totally unacceptable. If there is something to be said, one must said it firm & with conviction (no mumbling under one’s breath). The closest thing I can link my symptom to is nervousness? Uncertainty (about the subject of discussion)? From now on (Aug’09), I intend to articulate, enunciate & pronounce, as well as project my voice in high-definition. Beyond that, I sought to improve the quality of my sentences as well, i.e. “saying more with less”. In addition, recently I noticed a bad habit of some folks that begin their conversation when they have not engaged the attention of the listener, i.e. when both parties are some distance apart, when listener still has his earphones on, etc. Must be careful not to err in such a fashion.

WritingReduction of flowery phrases/bombastic words; MUCH more concise sentencesContent-rich sentences without being long-winded

Current status: extremely long-winded sentences

This bad habit of mine has taken its toll on my report writing and answering of exam questions. Exceeding of word limit as well as not having enough time to answer all the exam questions is no laughing matter. Frankly speaking, I’m at a loss as to how to rectify this, since I’ve been writing like this for a while. Given no time restriction, I will now review my writings to produce secondary drafts, but in ad-hoc events such as examinations, I will probably need to be less afraid of the “if-dun-write-will-leave-things-out” syndrome.

Skill-sets – <Photography, Writing, Global knowledge, Vocational Proficiencies, esp. SERE & SAR aspects, Negotiations>

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Comments
  1. SnOwAnGeL says:

    Not bad, you’ve actually pen down your reflections and goals… hopefully u can achieve them 1 by 1… maybe i can help to monitor the situation….
    but remember…no one is perfect… must love all your strengths and accept your weaknesses…

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